Volvoklub České republiky - fórum

Celej Brežněv.

Jancho to je ale eklhaft pikčr...

Já budu taky pěknej vejlupek, sice teda vočkovanej, ale taky heterák, a navíc s dýzlem a dalšíma dvěma střepama, z nichž jeden je redblock. Jo a taky flušu v parku a chčiju do potoka!

Tak HMS Shitboat přece jen vyplul. Fotečky převzaté od severokorejské agentury Kimpress zde:

https://www.blesk.cz/clanek/zpravy-politika/685631/zeman-dodrzel-dovolenkovou-tradici-a-vyrazil-na-rybnik-do-clunu-mu-pomahala-ochranka.html

Senior Parachute Club

Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me, again, asking why I didn't do something useful with my time. "Like sitting around the pool drinking wine isn't a good thing". (Talking about me "doing-something-useful" seems to be her favorite topic of conversation.)

She is "only thinking of me," she said, and suggested, I go down to the Senior Center and hang out with the fellas. So, I did and when I got home, decided to play a prank on her. I sent her an e-mail saying that I had joined the Senior Parachute Club.

She replied, "Are you nuts? You're 79 years-old and now you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?" I told her that I even had a Membership Card and e-mailed a copy to her.

Immediately, she telephoned me and yelled, "Good grief, Dad, where are your glasses?! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club."

"Oh man, am I in trouble," I said, "I signed up for five jumps a week!" The line went dead.

Life as a Senior Citizen isn't getting any easier, but sometimes it can be fun.

This old chap reminds me of someone I know...

Vim, proto jsem je taky Kájině ráno sebral a mám je na sobě.

No nevim…

Švícko se na posledním srazu vo Bimba vzorně staral:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-fX7wXa-e4

Tss, po půlnoci padni komu padni!

Na sraz dobrá.

Inu to je ten roztomilý dánský osvícenský absolutismus...

Slovenská střeva.

Jiří má eso...

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 bill fell out onto the sidewalk. Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said,

"Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me, officer."

"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. "Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"

"Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my backyard is next to a golf course. A lot of golfers come and pee through a knothole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off… kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'Why not make the best of it? 'So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knothole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers and every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I grab hold of it and
say, 'OK, buddy! Give me $20 or off it comes.'"

"That seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Not everybody pays."

Holaj-solaj (znamená mírnyx-týrnyx).